Networking Now

This is something I put together earlier this year as a bit of fun;

When analysing a set of company accounts it is important to read through the report of the CEO, Chairman or Directors. Here you will usually find some subtle signals as to the true health of a company that may otherwise be hidden in the numbers:

Below is a cynical look at some phrases that pop up in many company accounts and a cynical view of what they really mean :twisted:

A buoyant year — We did it, we are still around.
A year of consolidation — Something went wrong & we stood still.
Especially encouraging — not good.
We intend to continue to identify and implement cost saving programs across the organization — we are still leaking cash and the layoffs we made last year didn’t solve the problem.
Gaining ground on the competition — they had a worse year than us, ha ha!
He/She will continue to serve the company as an advisor — if we fire him/her, he will let out our secrets.
Engaged management consultants — we are in way over our heads.
Cautious optimism — Fingers are crossed and we hope for the best.
Unforeseen events occurred — our luck ran out.
Beyond our control — it’s not our fault, honestly.
Continue to divest activities that do not fit our new strategy — we are still paying for our previous bad decisions.
Impeded by lack of liquidity — Bank account is empty and the bank keeps saying no.
A new leaner company will emerge — We are getting rid of everyone one and starting again.

haha love that!

Wonder what ours will be!

very good like that one